Sunday Folies

Today

I woke up feeling a little guilty about bashing Martyr.  I thought about deleting yesterday’s blog because  that reason and because it requires some editing.

This morning, I had to go to the terminal because of badging problems (of course) DC is on the watch list because he missed two interviews. The Pass Office staff, where they issue badges are convinced the Vetting Bureau has fallen deep into folie.

‘’ He’s on the watch list? ’exclaimed the sweet little Romanian clerk. ‘’ Why? They are treating him as if he is he is Ossama Bin Laden. What next time they will put him on the black list and send orders to shoot him on sight? What the fuck is wrong with them?’’

Precisely, I thought. I know what Mitch is doing. He is making sure that next time he goes for his nex interview they will have all the recourse in the world to deny DC access on camp, just because he likes to act as Lord Douche.

‘’I’m surprised I don’t understand. He has 10 tracking warnings in his file,’’ she said.

1-      Failed to appear for screening and interview (lies he was there twice 30 mins in advance)

2-      Failed to appear to two interviews (same lie written twice-fuckheads)

3-      Failed to have his badge on him (it was confiscated by your office February 26th, because you dumb asses decided it was expired when in fact it expired March 2nd. Either your employees are illiterate or incredibly daft)

4-      Had unauthorized electronic device-telephone ( you put on his badge the phone privileges—your office authorized that decree)

5-      Had to confiscate his electronic (because you lot made a mistake)

The list was endless of doucheries.

This was another crazy pills moment. I couldn’t believe the amount of rubbish written in his dossier. Again, I had to convince these twats that DC is not a criminal because he broke some ridiculous rules on KAIA. This is another great reason to quit. It’s getting to a point where I cannot deal with this amount of lunacy. And to top it all off, I just learned they will not allow phone privileges to our pilots. Pilots! How the hell are they supposed to call us when there is an emergency, delays, bad weather etc…

‘’A few days ago,’’ I argued to the Security Officer ‘’our aircraft hit a bird which obstructed the landing gear and dented the aircraft. Our pilots executed an emergency landing in Mazar-i-Sharif, however they were unable to fly our passengers back. Thank God they had their phones and advised us of the situation!’’  He looked at me and said, ‘Yes, it’s true it makes sense. We still change the SOP’s (rules). You think.

Working with the military is no better than working with Afghans. Military personnel follow orders written by an officer and most of the times these servicemen are as dumb as can be and never question orders. Afghans follow the orders from the Koran and the Mullahs and never think outside the box or tries to understand the other side. They will do as they are told. So sad, same thing.

Going back to Martyr, as I stepped out of this long ordeal I saw her walking on KAIA with a lot of determination. I avoided her and went in another direction, but I saw her talk to Hashish and thought she was going back with him. I had my own ride back home with my trustworthy DC and Minni and arrived on camp without her.

When I stepped into my office I noticed across the hall that Giraffe was sitting all alone. She hadn’t come back yet Hashish was there. It was confusing; as I would have thought she’d want to go home asap since she was due to go on leave for one month today. I was so happy to be rid of Jezebel. I asked Hashish if she was dropping her off at the airport today and he retorted ‘’she don’t say to me nothing.’’ I asked if he could call her and inquire as sometimes she gets her own lifts. He did and I heard her say she’d be leaving at 3 o’clock.

I laughed, she hadn’t noticed there was a schedule change and the departure was at 4pm and not 5pm as usual. I wondered if I should say anything. I really didn’t want to help her out, but the thought of being surrounded by her negative, dramatic energy for one more day was quite daunting hence I cringed and called her. Three rings she didn’t answer—I did my best, if she calls back great, if not too bad.

A good friend of ours which she also had a fallout because of a drunken altercation he had with a stranger at the bar on New Year’s Eve (it’s a long story, one day…) was also looking for her.  Sonny is a great guy with a huge heart. He has been there for her through and through and beyond. He listened to her cry, vent, bitch about her dramatic episodes in Afghanistan and the one time he truly needed him because he was going through an extremely traumatic family crisis-she laughed and reverted their conversation back to her id. When I found out about that, it was the point of no return for me. Come after me, torture me, and backstab me. Fine! Don’t go after the innocent and good people who deserve nothing but the best, if you do that we are done.

Sonny is still not giving up on Martyr, I keep telling him he has Stockholm syndrome, but he laughs about it. It’s his life, I can’t judge him I’ve had years of abuse coming from that monster. Anyways, he was looking for her and she wasn’t responding to his calls. I cheekily said that maybe she was getting laid and retold him last night’s events. He was cracking up. But he wouldn’t take no for answer hence he decided to go knock on her door. He returned to my office semi-defeated saying he could hear someone in the room, but no one answered.

I shaked my head in disdain, as the past two month she’s been avoiding his calls and beckoning him only in dire times of crisis to speak about herself and vent against all her co-workers but never when he wants to see her.

As I finished my bitch session against her she texted me that she was on telephone. We were both surprised. She usually ignores me. We walked over to the café and had a lovely discussion about everything and nothing and while enjoying Sonny’s meal, he eating his egg sandwich and I nibbling on his fries I received a call from her Royal Highness.

‘’Sorry, I was on the phone. What’s up?’’ she said.

‘’Well, I just wanted to advise you that your flight is at 1640 not 1705,’’ I said nonchalantly.

‘’What there was a schedule change? I never noticed that. How come?’’

‘’I don’t fucking know,’’ I wanted to say but I was polite. ‘’ I asked Hashish to pick you up at 2pm.’’

‘’Oh, ok. Well I don’t know any more things have changed. Are you alone? Yes, well I was approached by ISAF and there is an investigation going on and they want me to stay and come in for questioning tomorrow.’’ No, no, no, no. Please leave go home, I thought.  ‘’I was on the phone with our boss and trying to explain the situation. I don’t think I’ll be going home as they told me I have to stay since the committee arrives tomorrow to start the investigation.’’

Then she explained she saw our Flight Manager while she was in the IJC building where Chief Air Ops works. We do not want to see her there interacting with him as she feeds him all sort of erroneous information about our company and demands favours from him, which is way above her pay scale. When he saw her there he was furious and freaked out on her as he was sure she went to his office to conspire against one of us. It’s just bad taste to douche on your coworkers with a Colonel.

She was extremely angry at him and Giraffe but very polite with me. I guess telling everyone about her love making session made her a little less hostile towards me.

Damn it I am falling asleep I will continue tomorrow.

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